The Toshiba is still in South Windsor CT. The disc is still being fished out. I kind of miss it. The replacement is a skittish and basically inept machine. How can a machine be inept? Isn’t that a human characteristic? Nope. Machine can be inept. The washer when you’re doing laundry and have sorted the loads and kept them all about the same size. Some load in the middle of the continuum of laundry will make it to the end of the cycle and you try to take it out to either hang it on the line or run it through the dryer and it’s soaked with suds. Another run through the cycle and it still weighs about five pounds more than it did when you tossed it in and you’re looking at another half hour dealing with this load and if it ain’t done in five minutes supper is gonna be delayed because when the washer isn’t doing its job as its a storage place for all the skillets and containers that have no place to go in your kitchen. At least in mine. Okay, back to mechanical ineptitude, we call them lemons, duds, pieces of s*** and an entire repertoire of terms. We enact Lemon Laws but the machine is smart enough to crap out twenty four hours after the law expires. And we develop a relationship with the repair shop.

General Vo Nguyen Giap died last week. For those of you who don’t know him, he kicked our ass in a country called Vietnam. He beat the French and tossed the Khymer Rouge out of Cambodia. He wrote the book on guerilla warfare, I read it when I was stationed in Japan. A book by an archenemy of our country in an Air Force base library. Strange, huh. A lot of people hold a grudge about the Vietnam War. But you have to admit the man came up with the primary theory of warfare: You have to win the hearts and minds of the peasants instead of conquering territory. Like all great men he fell out of favor when less hardline politicians came into power.

Carol Wright is sending me porn. Okay maybe not hard-c0re but interesting. Pages 40 and 41 have The Amazing Butterfly Kiss, Flexible Rabbit Massager, Totally Nude Yoga and Tai Chi and my fave Max Size. Like I need it. My problem comes from the fact these items are listed between pages for compression socks and stuffed talking parrots. The up side is it’s on pages 40 and 41, They could have put it on pages 12 and 13 with the Christmas ornaments. Personally I think it’s kinda funny. A wife to her husband: “The Carol Wright problem came in the mail today. They’ve got herbal pills to help you with that endurance problem and you can help me pick out a ‘marital aid’ that will comfort me while you’re away. And you’ve wanted to learn Tai Chi. They have nude Tai Chi, you’ll stay interested.”

Odd bits: I’m starting Nutrisystem this week. Last time I lost eighty pound but fell off the wagon big time. This time it works. Plus I’ve got an exercise bike to burn more calories.

Go to http://jesterkingblog.wordpress.com/about/ on Wednesday. I’ve begun posting recipes. Last week it was stuffed cabbage. I saw a post on Yahoo with the “best” recipe it had freakin’ ketchup in it. This week we’re going for a Turkey Florentine Meatloaf. I’ve made it for buffets and it went quick. Right now I’m dealing with the recipe to make it as simple as possible.

See you in the funnies.