I am a dues paying member of the American Humanist Society. I don’t agree with all of their ideas, the main one being there is no God. I just don’t believe in the white haired perpetually pissed off god who had the Jews wander around the desert for forty years and wiped out Sodom and Gomorrah. I can’t deal with an entity who makes up arbitrary rules. One is circumcision, why? If he didn’t want foreskins he should have left them off. Not eating pork? Ham, bacon and barbeque pork shoulder are among the top three foods in the world. He overreacted, Lot’s turned for a peek and he had her wind up as a pillar of salt. Not to mention the Ten Commandments. He sends Moses up the mountain and gives him the rules. Moses comes down and his brother has set up a false idol, he gets righteously pissed off and smashes the tablets. He has to clean up the mess, probably telling the folks that “God” will be really pissed. He schleps back up the mountain and gets a replacement set. They probably melted down the idol to make the ark to carry the tablets. Now to add to this, Moses didn’t start out as the leader of the Jews until his forties so by this time he was getting on in years. How does god reward him? When Moses asks for water god says strike the stone once. Moses hit it twice, he’s freaking old. Muscle coordination ain’t what it used to be. What does god do? After leading the Jews out of slavery, god let’s Moses see the Promised Land but won’t let him in. The Jews get their land and spend a whole crap load of time fighting enemies, each other, seducing wives and sisters and generally misbehaving. They proceed until the Jews are taken over by the Roman Empire. Half of the people are keeping their heads down and following orders. There’s a few who resist but they are taught harsh lessons. And the religious leaders are kissing Roman ass. At some point a guy shows up and says he’s the Son of God. He preaches love, acceptance, brotherhood and caring for all those who cannot care for themselves. The Romans kill him. His followers split and begin to spread the man’s words to the world. Most of them get killed for it. Question, if this is god’s son, how come he got killed and his followers suffered the same fate? Wouldn’t a god try to at least get the word about things he allegedly wanted taught through his surrogates spread as far as it could be? Now, the religion, has split. There are those who worship the old god, I think out of fear and the general dislike of change. The new branch, Christians, spread. After a while they start to argue among themselves over who’s interpretation of the Christ’s word is right. It doesn’t hurt that the church is a tad corrupt. They kill each other every now and again.

Here’s my point. If god is so good, wouldn’t he have paid a bit more attention to the creatures he created (us) and given us a little more guidance than ten basic rules and two books that were written after the fact and left open to interpretation fueled by the imaginations of people who claim to talk or hear from him. They get a lot of attention and cause a lot of trouble. They believe that if you don’t believe what they do, you should be killed. If you’re a non-believer of any stripe you’re an open target. We’ve killed a whole lot of people because of god.

Here’s a theory: Suppose there’s a being He/ She/It that wanders around the cosmos visiting places we’ll never see let alone know about. One day he found an empty space. He/She/It stuck a finger/probe into the void and started a reaction. He watched and left. He’s got massive ADHD and moved to another corner to start something else. The creatures evolved. As they became aware an old rule arose; God created man and then man created god. It became a franchise. Whatever worked in your area was the religion du jour. The collective consciousness created the being that destroyed cities, created arbitrary rules and demanded subjection. When the original creator came back to check the replacement hid and the original moved on. The replacement created forces of good and evil so we would have to rely on him. I don’t have a solution that would work for everybody. I was brainwashed by Catholic nuns and priests and sometimes I forget that most of what they taught me turned out to be wrong. Religions get people when they’re young and/or vulnerable and they follow blindly until they learn differently on their own or die believing things that strain credulity. A solution, don’t teach children any religion, when they’re old enough let them decide. Just don’t freak out if they pick some outré belief. Just love them and accept them.

Odd Bits Who the f*** has been working on designing can openers? I’ve bought five so far. The cheapest was 50 cents and the most expensive was $15.55 (it was on sale). Two have failed miserably, one fell apart. the fifty cent one is dangerous and I haven’t tried the $15.55 model yet.

It’s election season. Toss out all the mailers, they’re bulls***. A solution, go back to a repost here. Drunk Dialing Politicians, use it and pass it along. You’re gonna hear a lot from your senators and reps. They want to make sure that they’re not going to be unemployed. If they call, tell them you’re thinking. If they hold town meetings ask questions that ensure they won’t let another shutdown happen. Nothing scares a politician more than recall.

See you in the funnies. Visit http://jesterkingboog.wordpress.com/about/