I’m coming down with something. It usually happens this time of year. I should be looking at an allergy, but I really don’t want to go through the tests. Back when I drank medical diagnosis was easy, just ask the drunk sitting next to you and within minutes you’d have at least five diagnoses and as many remedies. All I’ve got now is an M.D. I’ve tried tea with honey. I prefer iced tea. I’ve switched to sleeping in flannel bottoms instead of gym shorts. I bundle up under my blanket and try to get the covers as close to my nose as possible to keep any stray cold germs from creeping in. I still wake up with a throat that feels like I swallowed glass shards and the cup of iced water I take with my morning medications clears it right up. Although I still have that “almost need to really cough” feeling for most of the day it doesn’t hurt. You know it might be the window fan. I haven’t turned it on in at least a week but it’s still in the window. Nah, fresh air never hurt anybody.

I’ve been listening to transcribed CDs of the Jack Benny radio show. They spotlight the work Mel Blanc did on the show. It was the result of the collective effort of Jack Benny, Mary Livingston, Dennis Day, Phil Harris and Don Wilson. Mel Blanc is uncredited. Today if radio had a viable outlet for radio comedies and dramas he would be credited. In the Benny show, Blanc plays any off the wall character required to harass Jack. Or provide the sound effects for Benny’s decrepit Maxwell. While I’m on uncredited cast members Eddie Anderson who played Rochester wasn’t credited. He was the perfect foil for Jack even if the show made references to dice playing and Black clubs. At the helm of the show Jack Benny was the master. His character was firmly limned and he was the master of timing. Even though the show was hugely popular on radio it took television to bring the mannerisms that fleshed out the persona to the general public.

There was a commercial for Gray Away on TV. First of all, if your hair is graying live with it. You’re gonna meet a whole other class of people. Secondly, gray hair gives you a free pass when you’re contemplating the various brands of peanut butter while shopping or driving the speed limit when you’re looking for that emissions testing station that doesn’t seem to exist. And, we don’t need another spray product aimed at our heads. Also if you can buy it at chain pharmacies and Dollar Stores maybe you don’t need it. Be distinguished look your age. Heading into middle age isn’t for wimps. Let the chicken sh*ts get plastic surgery. Every wrinkle and line has a story, people are just waiting for you to tell it.

They’re covering the Unabomber on TV. One thing, 300,000 word manifestos aren’t going to endear you to the public no matter how valid your point is. we want it in twenty five words or less. If it can fit on a tee shirt better.

Today is the late Jim Henson’s birthday:

Great song, two legends.

Support your local food bank. Read to a kid. Be nice to someone you don’t like. Remember all your relatives who have gone before you.

See you on Wednesday.